I remember thinking to myself that I should read the bible. That sounded like a really good idea. Than I looked at the “why” should I read the bible. Everything had a why. You ask enough times why, you will get an answer. Try it sometime. My why here is referencing the bible,why was I planning On reading the bible because I wanted to be closer to God.? Now this is typical of many people seeking on a path. We are told that is one way to get closer to God is religion. My religion growing up was Catholicism. Let me tell You the guilt I felt for not starting and finishing the bible. In the catholic school I attended, they encouraged you to read the bible and even received one at an early age. The pages were like tissue paper. So thin. I remembered feeling like if I was to rip one page I would be damned to hell. Yep guilt once again. The bible was filled with stories of Jesus, God, our father among his prophets and apostles and so forth. I was so confused on who was who. Now is God our father and than Jesus is ummm his son. So Jesus died on the cross but yet God was the almighty. Jesus came back to life and yet God gets all the prayers. Shouldn’t we pray to Jesus as he was magical. So confusing. I was confused my whole life and felt so disconnected. Who was I suppose to look to first. Who would be there. Religious people read these stories to get closer to God. This leads me to a lot of reflection as I think about books that I have read. Should I read the shining to get closer to Stephen king… No I read the stories to escape, to put my mind on vacation. Stories are stories and not what’s the closest to the truth. To seek for your God, divine and guru or spirituality you need to start where you can start. Remove the stories and get to the author. That author is you. To seek your spirituality it comes from within. It starts within your own truth. When we are lost or disassociated it’s because we have lived in the stories that were told to us. We created a book that was not our own. When you become the author of your own story you begin to live in a place of truth. You create your own ending. You make the connection to the divine. The answers all lie within. The story is waiting for to you to unravel. Ask yourself why enough times and you will find the truth. You are your own spirit, therefore you are your spirtuality.
It was presented to me yesterday with the comment that someone doesn’t understand homeless people and how they have a choice on what they are doing. To use drugs or not. To continue to put themselves in the worse case possible. I can’t speak for the homeless but can only see what I see and feel into my own perception. This perception I will share with you all. First… I am a firm believer that everyone is our mirror. Each person that comes into our life is a reflection of what is going on inside. What to look at, what to heal, and what to find love and joy from. If something comes up for you and in this case a negative feeling you have to ask yourself why is that. We have no control over what people do. BUT what WE do have control over is our perception and what we can do about that. I will talk more about that in a little bit. Second… We have no idea what that persons life was like or where there life is. We have know idea what kind of programming they have or what seeds of truth have planted inside of them. What is their blue print they are working with? They are where they are at. It’s foolish of us to expect them to change in an instance so we can feel more comfortable. Yes they are begging from us, they are surviving the best way possible for them. It is our choice to give or not when they beg. In that case feel from your heart and intuition and trust you do what you need to do. Once again we don’t have control of what they do but we have control over our own choice
Finally.. What we can do is recognize that this activates something inside of yourself. Ask what this judgement is about. Reach inside of yourself and find a way to let it go. You can offer up prayers or intentions to that other person. Instead of judging them, wish them well. Grant then a better life. You can do this in any way, from a distance or just an extension of your hand, hug or contribution. What they do with it is up to them. In that you get the opportunity to heal yourself. You release the judgement and look at others in a different light. When using this thought process you create an energy to that person of unconditional love. That alone can be forward movement for this person. We see this thought concept of hope and belief in many movies and fairy tales, for example, the movie elf when Santa’s sleigh wasn’t working and if the town has the Christmas spirit his sleigh will fly, or when Dorothy taps her red sleepers in Wizard of Oz and says no place like home and she goes home. Believing and setting good intentions out to others has so much power in it.
The practice in life..next time when there is judgement be aware of your own stuff. Look at it and offer up greatness for that other person and with that, quite possibly, it is allowing yourself to let go of something inside of you so you can allow more goodness to come inside you. Space is now created!
Recently I had someone at my house from another country. They have lived here for quite some time and I asked him why did he come to the states. I am always intrigued by other cultures and always curious if foreigners feel the same, that they come here for freedom too. I have heard some Canadians and people from New Zealand say that us Americans live in fear of our government. That blew me a way. Really the land of the free, how is that so? A perception that was unknown to me. Isn’t fear a lack of freedom, so how can we be free? Anyways, this gentlemen said he came here to be free. His government, when growing up, was very oppressed and coming to America was freeing. This concept of freedom has always had me thinking and analyzing. About what it truly means to be free. Can we live any where and be free??! I now know that you can be. Freedom exist within your heart and how you extend it outwards. It’s not about what you have or where you live but how you live within yourself. How you listen to your true self and letting the beauty within yourself shine. Sure we all come from somewhere, like our upbringing, our place of domicile, or where we have travelled on in our path but what remains forever, is your heart. Freedom is how you live out your life and the choices you make. You either go against your own nature or with it. It’s about learning to be completely present with your self and being you. Listening to your own truth and letting it shine regardless of what others think. An example of this is,if your familiar with pearl street in Boulder, there is tons of homeless people and street performers being who they are. Everyday they get judged, possibly a hundred times, on what they do, living and playing in the streets. Even in this judgement they continue on. How I see them is they have the courage to put themselves out there regardless of what others think. I personally think they add to the character of Boulder and make this place unique. They teach us so much about courage, strength, and giving and receiving. They are no different from you and I. When you Stand in your heart and Let all that truly doesn’t matter go, you live in a life of personal freedom. Do your work so you can be who you are meant to be. Let your light shine! When you do this, we will see that freedom does exist within ourselves not outside of ourselves!!!
Never thought I would say this but I am dating myself right now while dating someone else. I get to see what it is like to be with myself and figure out what I need and what makes me happy. Space can be so healthy as long as this space is being utilized for good. I think it’s imperative from time to time to date yourself and reconnect. To see what desires lie beneath who you are. To see if you have been honoring yourself and still your truth. I often wonder how can someone that is married date themselves while they have the demands of children, a spouse, possibly a career , and so forth, but with proper communication, it is doable. When we lose that communication within ourselves it can be very traumatic. It can spiral out of control and effect every relationship we surround ourselves with. When we get to this point, we need the opportunity to reconnect. To fulfill our own desires. It takes a lot of courage to want this for yourself and to even to ask for it. Especially when the momentum in your relationship is going strong. In reality though, momentum picks up because you truly love yourself and when you love yourself the world is at a whole new vibrational pull. When we navigate away from ourselves is when we lose ourselves and that’s when anger, anxiety, depression and illness sets in. Space allows continued growth and connection inside of ourselves. Marriage and dating doesn’t have to be finite. You don’t have to lose yourself in order to find love. Love first starts at home. Home is where the heart is! Love is Inside of you!
I know a lot of people recommend journaling as a way to move through things. To write things down to understand things better. I always got frustrated with that as I often wondered what good would this do if I was doing the writing and no one was given me any answers back. Now, I have realized that it gives yourself the opportunity to get to know yourself better. Journaling helps you to remove any judgements and allows you to be you. It helps to embody who you are. In a world like ours, we are constantly outside of ourselves trying to get somewhere. We often find ourselves doing a lot of things for other people and losing sight of what we truly want and desire. This takes us outside of ourselves. When we take the time to write freely, we begin to hear that voice inside of us telling us what we need to arrive at our very best. We begin to learn what is working for us or not. It than helps us to make steps forward to fulfill what we were meant to do. I also believe Journaling builds confidence because you begin to know who you are because you have taken the time to get to know yourself and when you get to this point of true knowingness there is nothing that will stop you. You just keep going. It becomes a visual aid for you to see into what has come before, what is happening in the moment, and where you are planning on going. It puts you right back on your path. This is a practice just like yoga, meditation, exercising or any other discipline. With practice, it only gets better. We keep doing it so we can achieve our personal best. I challenge you to 28 days of journaling and see how it goes. Within these 28 days if you have any questions please don’t hesitate to ask. It’s a journey worth doing. When you find yourself, you help others find their way too!!
As people say and there is always a calm after the storm. I often wonder if we truly get to feel that. How can we feel the pleasantry of the calm after the storm as our world around us keeps moving around us? How can we get ourselves out of the shit show to find the ultimate calm? In a transformation, your spirit is longing for the calm, the quiet to be heard. As we are working through our issues or navigating through the logical world the spirit is sitting in the back ground waiting to be heard but when we allow ourselves to get quiet and calm it gives the spirit and the human the ability to make the interconnection, the direct relationship between the two to merge. When The interconnectedness has been separated, due to trauma that was endured in the past, it is ultimately the quiet that connects you to you! The place where you are allowed to be you. The knowingness that resides within you. The TRUE you. We all have it, And it is never lost. As it may seem to be disconnected, it just take those moments of calm. Sometimes the reasons why we don’t find the calm is because we are trying so hard to get rid of the problem at hand. We become the doer of the worlds, instead of the allowers. It can be hard for some to let go of the control, but when we do that, to allow, we allow pathways to open up and for the universe and spirits to guide you. This happens when you create space with in yourself
We all want. We all have desires. Some believe that more wanting and desires causes more wanting and desires. Some believe it removes us from the moment and seeks us outwardly. But what if this wanting and desire wants to be fed? It is the feeling of truly telling us to move along our path. This wanting or desiring actually is the catalyst in teaching us to learn so that we can achieve our next steps on our path. It is our internal sensations or intuitions telling us to move forward. Like a domino falling to the next domino in a domino game. This desire doesn’t actually removes us from the moment but in reality it actually makes us feel abundant in the moment. Pushing the domino of life to the next one. And Seeing each moment as beauty. It allows us to open up and be expansive to what is and what is to come. This wanting and desire is key when it is not attached to materiality or others outcome but yet to our own true self. The voice inside is teaching us to move forward to live. We can absolutely live in the moment while still having desires and wants. These actions make our lives more fruitful when it is directed in the right manner. When we listen and respond to them we are seeing the true essence of ourselves. We than remove the good or bad or the right or wrong and succumb to what is because they are not perceived as mistakes but yet as learning. Life is about learning. What gets to learning is having wants and desires. So truly knowing what we desire and want moves us forward toward our own self love and freedom! So what are your wants and desires!
This morning, I woke up, and I was laying in bed and said to myself, “What are the most loving things I can do today for myself? How can I love myself even more?” My eyes were closed, and just by saying that comment, it brought love to myself. Next, the words that came in was to allow and trust. This brought a big freeing breath in, and my heart expanded. It doesn’t matter what you do, whatever your choice is, make a choice that whatever you are doing is a loving choice for yourself. If you ask yourself, if it is a loving thing to do, and you get a no, you get a choice to go against nature or with it. When we go against nature, we are going against our truth in the moment, and therefore moving farther away from loving ourselves more. If it is something that won’t leave you feeling bad, then I say do it. If you can let go of the judgements around it, I say do it. Allow yourself to get to know yourself. You have control of your own self love. So today, ask yourself, what is the most loving thing you can do?
Sometimes we strive in our lives to be perfect. As I have travelled on my journey, being perfect is just waaayyy too much work, therefore I strive to be imperfectly perfect. This is my mantra. This allows so much freedom in my life. This gives me the ability to do what I want, when I want to, without perfecting anything. It allows me to dance with the Universe. Ebbing and flowing to life is what this gives me. I can be who I want to be at any given moment.